a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes
the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It
is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes
producing an anticlimax. Ø I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So
I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
Ø Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level
and beat you with experience. Ø I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not
screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Ø Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car. Ø The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list. Ø Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
Ø If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
Ø We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. Ø War does not determine who is right - only who is left. Ø Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting
it in a fruit salad.
Ø The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Ø Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.Ø To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many
Ø A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a
train stops. On my desk, I have a work station. Ø How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it
takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Ø Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything,
but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs. Ø Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they
can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them
fish. Ø I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks.Ø Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an
emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". Ø I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you. Ø I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I
said "Implants?" Ø Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
Ø A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Ø You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice. Ø The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas! Ø Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back. Ø A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a
way that you will look forward to the trip. Ø Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even
if you wish they were. Ø Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with. Ø Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.Ø There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so
they can't get away. Ø I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure. Ø When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Ø You're never too old to learn something stupid.
Ø To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target. Ø If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some
people have more than one child?
Ø Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine